x. this year's most open heartbreak .x

Monday, July 03, 2006

^serkooool^

tuesday mornings will be free for the rest of the weeks left of schooling before semestral exam starts. no more practical for microbiology. no more dealing with illness-causing bacteria, yeasts and the likes of microorganisms. and school starts at 12. waahooooooooo

wednesday, no lecture!!!! 'cause there's graduation day taking place. but too bad! i have an industrial visit to attend, and we're like going to Coca-cola factory? like, AHHHHHHH

i want to go CPTC haha eh dream on

waaweeeee. i passed my Chemical Process Principles paper. like hAAAHAA my constant R is all wrong laa. see i SUCK at stochiometrical calculations and such. salah course tu sebab. i want to go Aerospace siarl. but toooot. too late

i'm like so beat lah. and i don't think i actually have any feelings for the boyfriend. ok what a bitch. but, my priorities are like, FRIENDS, FAMILY & STUDIES. plus one more, the CULTURE. haaaa 'time lambat la gila.'

Gig! i want to go to gig. skank, mosh, pogo. haiyah when when when will be the next gerek gig. no ALL SKA gig please. yeah i still like ska no doubt about it, but it's just the same bands playing the same songs over and over again and it gets pretty boring. i want a gig like last year's Toa Payoh CC gig. that's fun fun fun fun fun!

\\ EDITED
i've no slightest idea as to why i blogged like that. but perhaps it's all because of stress. STRESS GO AWAY!

ps ; i might be moving to a new blog. so just keep on checking lah yea.

x.i ♥ him.x . .6:37 PM

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Saturday, July 01, 2006

^screw^

i just realized that that Shah Iskandar is quite cute eh. hahaha the smile omg~

that aeronautical engineering skinhead is so cute =D

i've come to realize that this relationship is all but a fellany. i'm to blame, duh~

my rude self has come back alive. and even ruder than that. fought with my mom just now. i used AKU-KAU instead of the norm, ORANG. ok wtf. i cant go to the gig. and i should have known and not went out last saturday.

fuck the boyfriend.

having a boyfriend is so boring, can? i've told them, if he didn't strangle me, i'll strangle my ownself first. because he is obviously depriving me of some space for me to breathe, with who i want to hang out with. i want the old days back, hanging out with the simei people, the independent rudies, shavenheads, the tampines people, everyone. it's been only 1 week but i'm already feeling the lack of oxygen.

heh.

my past had really poisoned my impressions on men. no wonder they are from MARS.

i'm thinking of chocolates now.

x.i ♥ him.x . .1:01 AM

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Wednesday, June 28, 2006

^sunsetter^

ooh. third day in school. i was late for half an hour just now. got back the computer studies ICA paper. i got a 52, plus 3 marks from the E-learning quiz. but still a D lah. damn. my microbiology marks had dropped, but it's still an A.

after that had some birthday celebration. they asked me why i was so 'sian'. basically i was just so worried about the upcoming CPPB test lah. and right, i really screwed up the paper. i could not even attempt the multiple choice questions.

good job ma-farka. i think basically all these formulas and mole calculations are just not my thing. then why the eff am i in this course anyway? haiz. i just want to work like my father. haha. it's a guys job la frankly. but i've no idea if it's chemical processing or engineering that gets to work there.

i want to get good GPA laaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa.

oyarh, after paper, rushed to dover station and meet hafiz. HE'S BACK FROM AUSSIE babes. like omfg la the pictures on his blog is sooooooo awesome. and he went snowboarding. laughed at his video he posted on youtube. and his little sister is so CUTEEEE lah. camwhore also like the abang. hafiz bought for me some souvenirs. haha basically it's some candies and a very nice scented candle. soooooo nice ok the smell.

i think my dad knows i've got a boyfriend. 'cos i've forgotten to change my display picture ahhhhhh.

i don't know. this relationship seems soooooo wrong.

and he's shorter than amirah. height doesn't matter lah but, AHHHHHH. tah lah. amirah if you're reading this don't laugh eh. and he's shorter than azri also.

kiiimakkk. ape sia.

SCREW CPPB PAPER. i did the questions anyhow. can still sleep summore.

x.i ♥ him.x . .5:59 PM

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Monday, June 26, 2006

^school?^

today marks the first day of term 2. as usual, i was LATE. like, really2 late. haha damn. the racist lecturer was kind of sarcastic to me. 'run also tired ah?' wtf. i got BLOCCCKED nose okay.

EVERYTHING FOR RWP I GOT A C. what the... ahh. never mind, language has never been my thing at all anyway.

but overall the whole day felt kind of lethargic. oh yahr, during break had to go to the workshop to do the practical. but the guys didn't tighten the grinder properly so the whole thing FLEW. DCHE kids were there, some are my friends. ahh, so embarassing man. then had to redo the whole thing.

ok. i think that's it?

i've been charged for abuse using the malay language. haha wtf. ok la the ones who understand Malay literally laughed till they cried lah.

and i just said, 'macam anjing.'

x.i ♥ him.x . .6:58 PM

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Friday, June 23, 2006

^ARGH.^

our second date hahahaha

waawaawoo. eh i miss my childhood days. the days when i stayed with my aunt because my parents went onto a pilgrimage, almost each day i fought with my cousin. wrestling in fact. but i'll always end up crying hahaha.

i'm so doomed lah can? it's back to school in less than 72 hours and i still hadn't done the reports and tutorials. to make it worst i hadn't gone to the National Library to do the research i was supposed to do for Microbiology. yes, the internet is here to make life easier, but we're not really allowed to rely solely on the internet because the information stated might not be reliable. who knows who is behind the internet.

so i'm staying home and trying to complete the assignments, like a good girl should. hahaha. i'm turning down request from people who asked me to tag along and jam with them. waahoo. and i badly want to go to the gig at Youth Park today la eh. The GREAT SPY EXPERIMENT lah deh! omg omg omg. am i going to miss the fun? there should be some skanking along too, fishtank is playing as well if i'm not wrong.

wahoooooooooooooooooo.

saturday saturday. city hall here i come. i miss my wani man, she's back from Pahang i think. she's so lucky, overseas school trip. unlike what Pasir Ris Sec has to offer, a day trip to BATAM? so boooring lah. tak ada challenge.

i'm trying to adjust myself to other songs, and most probably mainstream. haha. the CLASSMATES are pissed off by my oh-so-loud songs. GAH~ support the local scene babes

x.i ♥ him.x . .1:13 PM

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Tuesday, June 20, 2006

^reminisce^

i wished i could hit the rewind button and replay the whole scene once again. the serenity, the lush greenery of the park, folks doing taichee, ahh the warmth of his cute little hug.

it's time that i move on.

mom said it doesn't matter if he's short or tall, but NO BOYFRIENDS allowed for the time being. studies first lass.

if only his stomach didn't grumble, we could have spent more time time together ; that's what he said. ahhhhh.

i sense something is bothering him, and it bothers me.

Germany's match against Ecuador. go go go deutchsland. i hope Brazil gets knocked out at round 2, who knows. this year's matches brings unexpected results. ho ho ho.

the least i wish is to see an England Vs Germany's match. USoffuckingA can go and pack their bags and play BASEBALL. the yanks are such wussies.

know what, i hope next season's EPL, there'll be a Liverpool Vs Chelsea match. then we'll get to treat each other lunch if either one lost. ooooooooooooo scareh.

ahh. stalker stalker everywhere, punk or skinhead i don't care. 'cause i sense love's in the air.

ala. bosan lah. where is my little midget?

x.i ♥ him.x . .10:17 PM

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^ooooh the sweetest things^

second date in two weeks. initially met the classmates at 1 for the IDEAS project, continued till until around 5.30 when Haikal reached OCBC building. so left them from there since i didn't bring any material for the prototype.

overall, he's the sweetest thing i've ever had.

left the lads from OCBC and proceed to someplace, which i think is near Chinatown. sat at the park. our initial plan was to play pool, but since i'm no pool player ( and i don't want to end up like Amirah, pool ball hit to another pool table ), he decided to take me elsewhere. hm, macam sweet kan tak pegi kerja tapi jumpa sahabat perjuangan dia instead. and the way he talked to his mum, alala, mummy's boy betul lah. from far he looked like a small boy who ran away from school. he used his class tshirt dated back then in 1999. WHOA

so anyway, talk cork sing song session. as time flies by, sky got darker. but stars never showed up. you know, we might be the odd ones lying on the grass mesmerizing the beauty of God's creation, but the stars NEVER showed up. not our luck i guess. in just that few hours, i got to know much about him. his secondary school life, and such.

and me being the dumb one ( weather didn't seemed fine and i didn't bring along my jacket ), my body got so cold. like HAHA padan muka zu tu lah lupa nak bawak jacket lagi.

*teringat lagu too phat ; if you cold wrap hoodie round your back* tapi dia tak berbuat sebegitu. sebaliknya, dia memberiku pelukkan yang amaaaat kuat sekali. aku berasa kekok, kerana aku jarang berbuat sedemikian kepada sesiapa. so yeah, that moment of warm hug lasted for i don't know how long but i remembered we only left around 9.30.

he admitted he's a bad kisser. ahahaha, opps. who cares? i obviously don't look like someone who cares about whether one's good at kissing or the absolute other way around.

went to this place and sapedek. i was too *shy* to ask him to buy me a meal and so i watched him ate. furthermore i wasn't really hungry, i could still feel the BK meal i had in the afternoon. he didn't finish his noodles though, macam nak abiskan, tapi malu hehehe. macam mana nak grow, makan sikit saje.

oh yahr, we were the main attraction along the streets. kalau tidak dipegang tangan, bagaikan kakak dengan adik. jika dipimpin tanganku, hmm, dah kenapa pulak lah kan. he's shorter than me. got disturbed by 3 mats on a deserted street. could see that he was slightly worried. ye ah, mat2 kan, pompan pun drg nak bagi. ahlah whatever.

waaaaaa. the sweetest things...

then got lost at Raffles place. couldn't find the MRT station. by the time it was 10.30. i had to be home by 11, he insisted that i take the cab home. but i wondered how? i didn't bring along much cash though. he willingly paid for me, and rejected the 5 bucks i wanted to give him, split cab fare lah katakan. i asked the cabbie to just drop us outside, so that Haikal could just take the bus to the MRT station and leave from there.

but NOOOOOOO he insisted to send me right to the doorstep. i was kind of worried about him too. what i heard about his father did to him, and furthermore he has his exams in a few hours time and he hasn't studied and it's already 11! so yeah, he sent me right till the lift closed and left. he took the cab home. ahhh i feel so bad. he like wasted 26bucks on just cab fare for me to tampines and back to chua chu kang seh. ahhhh

somehow i'm grateful to have him. even that EX is not like him lah okay. he actually cared sa, i'm so touched seh. he made sure i made it back home before 11, and he even made sure that i'll be safe from any matrep wrongdoings. watch out for the couple on saturday eh *winkz*

♥ Haikal Abdurrahman =)

THIS ~~was~~ IS a SKINHEAD LOVE AFFAIR

x.i ♥ him.x . .1:01 AM

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